Girls are Hyenas. No such thing as a Girl Code

Hello everyone. Happy Sunday. Now a bit of good news before I delve into the issue of today. Read yesterday on Yahoo that a man who started an exercise regime, developed an illness called Rhabdomyolysis (the ‘R’ is silent….I think). His muscle fibers deteriorated to the point that his urine turned to Coca-Cola (his words, not mine). I am totally going to ignore the fact that this was P90X Insanity, which as the name implies, is arguably the toughest regiment out there, and the guy who had not exercised in years jumped into the rigorous program that his body obviously wasn’t ready for. I am going to ignore all that and say ‘EXERCISES MAKE YOU SICK’

Husband- Are you not working out today?

Me- What? Are you kidding? Don’t you know that doing exercise now gives you Rhabdomyolysis? eh hen!!! That’s your plan abi. You want me to fall sick and die so that you can marry another wife (breaks down crying)

Husband (confused)- huh?

Ok, the above scenario has not happened yet, but I intend to use it in the nearest future

Rambling done. So a few days ago, I posted a mail sent in by one of my readers. There was a comment made by a friend of Mine, Tokunbo that inspired this present post. You can read that story and the comments here, but the short version is that she mentioned that one of the parties messed with the girl code by sleeping with her friends’ ex and I was like “There is a girl code????””

Lets face it. Girls are the meanest creatures to other girls. For reasons unknown, we don’t like each other. We may coin stupid titles like ‘BFF” (anyone above 12 and not white that uses that phrase should be shot), but given the opportunity, we would tear each other from limb to limb. We are the biggest critics and biggest fault finders. Not in ourselves. We are perfect, but in other girls, we do not hesitate to tear them down as much as possible. I am going to give a few examples.

Take it from High school. You see the mean popular girls picking on those less good-looking for no tangible reason, other than the fact that they don’t look like you. You would see other girls branding some as dirty, smelling, skinny or fat and that brand would follow them all through their school days. I remember in the university, my roommates had a classmate that they called ‘Dirty Sally’ (sally not her real name of course). They called her that all the time(even to her face) that it became part of her name and her description. One day, two of their classmates came to the room to study or visit (can’t remember which)and the conversation swerved to dirty sally. I vividly remember one of the boys say “why do you girls call her that? that’s not nice”. One of my roommates responded “That’s what she is”. Hmmmmmm…… That’s what she is…..

Girls would spread malicious rumours about other girls, whether true or false, because we like to see other girls put down. It is ‘gist’ and a source of amusement for us. You would have a girl who sleeps with multiple boys in school, insult other girls branding them as whores and ashawos because they sleep with men for money. They discuss such girls with glee while ignoring their own dirty closets. You would see two girls sleeping with the same guy and instead of getting pissed that the guy was playing them both, they decide to do Brandy and Monica ‘The boy is mine” and fight each other. Girl Code?? ha! I recall an incident when a friend of mine took her friend to Abuja to meet her new boyfriend. While the girlfriend was in the kitchen cooking, the friend was watching TV. The boyfriend made advances to the friend which made her angry and she left. When they got back to school, the other friends berated the girl for not staying in the kitchen with the girlfriend, if she had, none of that would have happened. I remember thinking “Are you F******g Kidding me? (Then I could only say the “F’ word in my mind. How times have changed)

Forward to adulthood, who rains the most insults on women who have reached 30 and are not married? Women! Who coined the phrase ‘Go and marry’. Women!. I visit Nairaland daily and there may be an article on Rita Dominic and an outfit she is wearing (I really really hate that ‘Hot or Not’ phrase that those bloggers use all the time. Where is the creativity?). Instead of discussing the outfit, they start bashing her how she is over 30 and unmarried and the bulk of people writing that- Women!. Who taunts a woman who has not been able to give birth to a child? her mother in law, sister-in-law or women generally married into the family. It is women who say things like, “That woman must have destroyed her womb with plenty abortions or she is a witch who has eaten all her children”. The circle goes on and on.

So, Tokunbo, my dear, no such thing as a girl code. We are like hyenas. We may travel in packs, we may laugh together, but let one of our own fall, we would not hesitate to eat the fallen one. Of course they are great girls who are truly wonderful and true to their friends, but the majority of girls are out for themselves.

Not trying to bash girls. Why would I? I am part of the hyena pack. Majority of us are, even if we try to deny it. Na Hyenas we be. This is my opinion though. I would love to read dissenting views.
sister's feud
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4 Comments Add yours

  1. AB says:

    I know women can be difficult. Women can be bitchy and unnecessarily hard on other women. Some women say or do things and set the progressive movement back by 100, 200 years.

    But I love women. I love to uplift my fellow females, and so does my mom.
    I have amazing female friends who I would not trade for anything or anyone in the world. I totally see what you’re saying, but from my own personal experience, I cannot say women are almost always out for themselves- cos I and the women I know, are not.

    Men are generally more easy going, but this does not really make them better people. It definitely does not mean that every man wants the next man’s progress.

    When girls say things like oh, I don’t like hanging with girls cos they’re bitches, I worry. I need my sisters, you need your sisters. Our relationships can be complicated, but us sisters need to stick together.

    1. herapereira says:

      I was not making an absolute statement. There are wonderful women. Of course men have their issues, no doubt but like you said they are more easy going. While we need to stick together, we cannot ignore the wrong things we do and pretend that it does not exist because we want to form solidarity. The whole article was to debunk the whole girl code belief

  2. Sandeey says:

    your writing is just so wonderful. i love your posts! This one made me laugh. Keep it up!!!!

    1. herapereira says:

      thank u dear. Thank you for reading.

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